Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Hello, I'm from Texas


Today I fell asleep in class and had a dream.

A dream I would not dare tell to anyone in person lest they laugh and call me ridiculous.

What, pray tell, you ask could be so ridiculous? How about the fact that I dreamt about a fictitious character? Well, ok the way I just described it would make it seem less harsh than what it actually was... Let me elaborate in story style..... first person point of view yo!!

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I was walking, well more like stumbling along the forest trail trying to find one hint of ground that wasn't completely covered in vines and roots. Even though I knew my search for cold concrete ground was futile I trudged on even deeper into the forest, searching for.... well I don't completely know....

After a while I started to feel chilly, which to me was very odd because it was exceptionally sunny outside. However, I didn't really care. I just shrugged my shoulders and continued walking, occasionally I would pause to rip a random vine that had tried to trip me out of the earth.

Sometimes, I would peer over my shoulder just to make sure nothing was following me. I wasn't stupid, I've seen scary movies where random people get lost in the woods and end up getting killed and eaten by random cannibals. Randomness attracts randomness.

Too bad I wasn't paying attention to where I was going because while I had my head turned I tripped over one of the accursed vines that had preciously tried to kill me. I fell, and tumbled, and rolled HARD, and when I finally tried to stand up I fell right back down. I mumbled a few curse words under my breath and grabbed my leg, which seemed to have gone dead on me.

I touched my nose, feeling something wet and cursed again seeing that it was red. "Oh cwap. It fweels bwoken." I mumbled as I tried to stop the gushing waterfall of blood spurting out of my nose. "Ugh I swound like a twotal looswer..." I trailed off under my breath.

Totally lost in my own world, I jumped when something tapped my shoulder. I turned around and almost screamed. Right in front of me was Fitzwilliam Darcy.

Mister.Freaking.Darcy. OH MI GAWD.

I almost hyperventilated on the spot when his hand reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a handkerchief. I held my breath as he handed me the cloth, not hesitating in the least bit to take it.

"Are you ok?" He asked as I mopped up the blood on my face.

"Oh....er well..."

He raised a quizzical eyebrow. Arg... I hate it when people do that.

"Er yeah? I mwean, uh.." I trailed off again. He nodded and extended a gentlemanly hand to help me up, but once he got me standing I fell down again with an "Oof!"

"Cwap! I cwan't feel my weg...." I groaned.

Mr. Darcy only shrugged and lifted me again, this time placing one of my arms over his shoulder so I could lean on him. Mmmhhhmmm he smelled like yummy.

It felt like forever until he finally spoke again but when he did he asked me what type of clothes I was wearing. At first I was going to say 'Uh dur a shirt and jeans, whaddya think a moleskin?' but I caught myself remembering that he came from a different time period.

"Er dis is what all da pweople in Twexas wear."

It looked like he was about to ask something, but right at that moment the bell rang. I groggily opened my eyes and looked around in disappointment.

Oh how I despise reality.

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