I honestly don't understand why this is such a hard concept for people to grasp. Often, I'm frustrated by the complacency of others and how they can live life, stagnant, and then be angry at the world for something that is completely of their own doing. Then again, people are often frustrated with me because they don't understand my need to "go the extra mile" or my cliché "go big or go home" philosophy.
In fact, my life philosophies can pretty much be chalked up to a list of clichés, such as the aforementioned.
I'm ok with that.
But back to my point. People need, no OUGHT to live their BIG dream, even if that's being married with 2.5 kids, THAT'S OK. If that's what you want then don't let anyone give you crap about it. The same with being a transgendered guy named Zooey. It's ok. However, people are somehow under the assumption that as long as giving up their dreams/hopes/THOUGHTS in the name of altruism, it's ok. It's not. It's selfish because eventually the happiness of others won't be enough for them to live off of, and eventually whatever happy, fuzzy feelings they had towards the object they gave up their dreams for will turn into sour, bitter resentment.
Believe me, my mom is a living example of the aforementioned.
A lot of people don't understand my mindset. They think I'm selfish. And yeah, is it so bad to be in my own corner? The world has dealt me a great deal of rotten fish (definitely not as much as others) and a lot of the time I was the only one who completely understood what I was feeling. Because of this I developed a mentality that makes it nearly impossible to sway how I feel once my mind is completely made up.
Don't like my hair? Too bad.
You think reading Ayn Rand is offensive? Oh well.
You don’t like my shirt? Did you buy it? That’s what I thought.
I’m willing to concede on things (most of the time) if I’m overstepping my bounds, but really I found that I can still function and be happy with myself and my choices if I just take care of what I want and need. Every aspect of my life that I am in control of I base around this mindset and it doesn’t make me a bad person. I still volunteer on a regular basis,I’m still an active member of my community, I haven’t kicked any puppies, and I no longer feel the weight of depression that was caused by the judgment of others. I didn't care if they didn't like the way I dressed, I didn't care if they thought I was weird for being in debate, yearbook, multiple AP classes, and art--- sacrificing what could have been a "fun" life in their opinion. You know what, being busy makes me happy. And as an added extra, I don't have a criminal record!
In short, do what you want. Get what you want out of life. Do what makes you happy. Don’t throw away your big dream/goal because someone thinks it’s stupid or doesn’t see the point in it. They’re not you. They don’t understand. Maslow, this old guy who knew a lot about human nature said that the highest state a human can reach is self actualization. One major hurdle that most people overlook is the people that surround them. They mean well, but don’t let them get in the way of your dream.
So now, I will leave you with yet another cliché, from the children’s movie Horton Hears A Who:
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
*P.S. I’m leaving for camp Monday and I won’t be back until the 24th, so the likelihood of any online activity from me will be nonexistent. Also, I’d like to give credit to Nido Qubein for the title of this post, and the ideas it spawned.