Thursday, January 31, 2013

There's so much going on in my head right now.  It's crazy, jumbled, at times a little too much, but it's normal.    At least, that's what I've been told.

I get so tired of people asking me how I feel about leaving, how my family feels, how JB feels, and of course "Are you ready?" and I regurgitate the bland, "Oh yes, they're all excited for me. I'm a little scared, but I think I'm as ready as I'm going to be."

I know that I shouldn't be so upset over people trying to take an interest in my life, but sometimes I get so tired answering the same question over an over.  Like, how am I supposed to convey the feelings of others?  Because in all honesty my younger sister already resents me for leaving her to take over all of my responsibilities around the house, my youngest sister probably won't miss me that much aside from no longer being scolded about leaving her dirty clothes everywhere.  And Steven.  Poor little guy is only four, so he's still having trouble grasping the fact that I'll be gone for months on end.  And I won't even get started on my parents.

I recently became friends with a fellow trainee who shares my ship date, and it's been nice talking to someone that's going to be entering the same experience at the same time.  We met on the FEB 2013 AFBMT Facebook page where all of the trainees shipping out for the month can talk.  Not that many people participate on it, which is odd, because I've heard in the past that pages like this are very popular, but then again it's not advertised.  Most people don't really know to look for it.

Anyway, talking to him made me feel reassured.  In all honesty my situation isn't that bad. He's leaving behind a crazy ex-girlfriend that didn't want him to enlist, and an entire life that he had already started, whereas I'm just getting started.  I'm lucky that JB is so supportive, and he's already talked about visiting me as soon as I'm allowed to have people see me, which will be a while.

Like, aside from my graduation weekend, it'll be a few months before I get to see him.  My parents have been bugging me about having a long distance relationship, but that topic is for another post, at another time.

This weekend I'll be spending time with friends, trying to enjoy my last 19 days of civilian life.

Edit:  I found this neat little website that has slideshows for all 8 weeks of training if any of you are curious as to what I'll be doing once I leave.  I found some of the captions humorous.


  1. yikes lizzi, this all sounds so stressful! & scary...
    i took a look at the slide shows. intense!
    one of my really good friends was in the air force. he loved it. it becomes a part of everything you are.
    you will be fine, lizzi : ) also, all of us blogger family are rooting for you!

  2. I won't pretend to know what it's like for you right now. I am sure it's not easy to vocalize, or put into writing. I also won't ask if you're prepared or how you feel because I know the feeling. I'm so tired of having to answer what I'm majoring in. Maybe I just don't know yet. Yes, maybe Anthropology is a terrible major but that's what I want to do.

  3. I'm still scared for you. Those few weeks sound like absolute hell.

    Also, I'd send you an letter but I have no way of getting your address. And I'm trying not to use Facebook since my little incident. :(