I am really hard on myself. Really hard.
If I screw up knowingly, it's devastating. Stupid, little mistakes are the worst because I know that they could have been prevented if I was just more thorough and aware.
Right now I'm beating myself up for screwing up homemade cornbread, and it's bad. Constant self doubt, self criticism, internal berating.
What's silly is that no one is angry at me. But I can't help but feel angry at myself. I wasn't fully focused on what I was doing, and I accidentally added the batter into the oil instead of vice versa. Ughhhhhh.
What am I going to do when I get to BMT? Every action is going to be scrutinized under a magnifying glass. If I'm like this when I screw up little things at home, how am I going to be when I get down there?
I just need to remember to take deep breaths. Don't get upset, just fix whatever's wrong. It doesn't do any good to get angry at myself.
Constant focus. That's what I need to put all my energy toward.