When I began I initially went solely under the pseudonym Bookish.Spazz, and never even DARED mentioning my real name or anything. Over the years I met some wonderful, like minded people who made me feel comfortable enough in my writing and the things that I shared that I became a little more lax about things (like becoming FB friends/Twitter followers, etc.). At the time a handful of my friends knew that I wrote a blog, and only my closest friends even had the URL.
But now? As I grew older, and as blogging grew in mainstream popularity more and more people at my school started blogging and discovering my blog. What makes it worse is the fact that things that I've shared with you guys (my wonderfully awesome blogger friends) are now known to people who I previously thought could have cared less about my personal life. At school I'm classified as the sarcastic, artistic spazz who often has contrasting opinions on pretty much everything (especially politics), but online I feel more like myself--- and the fact that people can read about my love/hate relationship with my grandma or my somewhat crazy mom, and other awkward things at times makes me feel a little uncomfortable because in person, it's really hard for me to talk about these things without cracking a cynical joke here and there and brushing things off like it's no big deal.
Earlier today I thought about removing some posts that I thought would offend people from my school, but the more I thought about it the more I realized how absurd that was. This blog is for me. The reason why I made it and kept it is because it not only allowed me to share the triumphs and high points in my life, but it also was a way for me to open up and get words of support and comfort when I was down. So you know what? I'm done being paranoid and uncomfortable with the idea that people that I know IRL read what I write.
If they don't like it they can just read the disclaimer off to the side and move on with their lives.
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Now onto another tangent. I've also been getting an influx of new commenters who just drop by, tell me I have a nice blog, and ask me to follow them. This bothers me. It's like a one night stand, but in comment form. This happened to me before, back when I was a blogging newbie and I naively took the bait and followed/linked them only to never hear from them again.
Let's get two things straight right here and right now:
1) I don't like popularity/attention whores in real life, so obviously that means that I don't like them online either. Getting new readers is awesome, but honestly it means nothing to me if they don't genuinely care about what I'm writing and their only ambition is to hit 1000 followers so they can brag about it to their friends. There's a difference between meeting new bloggers to become friends with and just using people to boost your blog up the ranks.
2) If you stumble upon my blog and just randomly decide to follow me, I'll check out your blog, and if I like it I'll follow it. It's as simple as that. Rarely do I follow fashion blogs because I honestly think most of them are just random girls who think pairing a heavy wool sweater with daisy dukes and stilettos is cool. It's not. It just means that you still dress like a 5 year old and you have no idea what the weather is outside. If I find a fashion blog that I like (ex. this, this, or this) then I follow it and I don't expect a followback because usually the blog is run by someone in the fashion/design industry and they have better things to do than read some 17 year old's blog. However I often get these follow requests from amateurs who are only trying to gain quick popularity and I just ignore them.
Anyways, I'm going to step off of my soapbox for now and call it a day.
*In Real Life
Oh goodness, I know exactly what you mean. First, no one knew I had a blog. Then a friend or two found out about it. Then they found the URL. Then they made blogs (though they didn't last very long). Now people from my school are started to blog, including this one kid that consistently links to it on his Facebook, and he found my blog through a comment I'd left on my friend's, and ugh. So complicated. And now I'm just really paranoid that somehow my entire blog will be broadcast all over Facebook. SIGH.
ReplyDeleteAnd I also completely understand about the people that only follow/comment because they want someone to follow/comment for them. I'm pretty sure 90% of the followers/comments I get are like that... SIGH AGAIN.
Oh well.
I feel like all of us veteran bloggers are in the same boat with the IRL/Online thing. And of course, the follower craze.
ReplyDeleteGoodness, I think you're doing pretty damn well for yourself.
Also, I would have sent you to HP World, not therapy.
Have a good day!
I know what you mean! Many people have found my blog from school and such and it makes me so nervous. I just try and not think about it when I post things. :)
ReplyDelete<3Chelsea Elizabeth
http://www.organizedxxmess.blogspot.com
I can draw a lot of parallels to my blogging experience too. I began one in 2007 on AOL Blogs out of pure boredom and then met some really awesome people through that. Only my friend Zack ever really knew about it. When that feature ceased to exist in late 2008, I switched to here and then three of my "friends" followed. Since then I've gradually found more people I genuinely enjoy reading and have taken friendship to the level of Facebook, haha.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure what it is, but I only receive those kind of comments once and while. And when I do, I just ignore 'em because, as you wonderfully put, they're attention whores. :)
Oh, and I meant to say that various IRL friends have the URLs, including my oldest brother, but thanks to busy lives, reading about my adventures/complaints/whatever is inconsequential in comparison so there's no drama.
ReplyDeleteWell, actually, there was one case where this one IRL friend essentially posted anonymously "get a life" and here's my rebuttal: http://dreamsusreal.blogspot.com/2009/08/dear-anonymous-commentor.html
I figure it's worth a laugh. :)
@Natalie I know it’s sort of mean-ish to say this, but I don’t think the kids from my school who recently took up blogging are going to last that long anyways :P It’s a little re-assuring!
ReplyDelete@Shelbyisms Well at least I’m going to HP World in a few weeks! I’m sure it’ll more than make up for all the awkward therapy sessions.
@Chelsea Elizabeth It’s hard for me to be completely candid, but you’re right in the end it’s just best not to think about who’s reading and just post for yourself.
@Lizzie Oh my. I loved that rebuttal. It more than made my day.
my blogger is from 08 also! and ppl i know irl read my blog sometimes
ReplyDeleteI love your blog!
ReplyDeleteAnd I totally agree. I had a blog before my current one that I recently started like a week ago, and it really just started as a way for my silly-freshman-girl-self to vent and ramble. But then people I actually knew began to read it and I regreat to report that unlike you, I didn't have the courage to continue so I ended up just making the blog private and eventually starting my new one. Awkwaaard. It's good to know that others feel the same weirdness about others finding their blog though.
You're brave, I ended up creating a whole new blog for my family and real life friends because I just couldn't muster the courage to give them access to my old posts. I also started with a username, but now we're friends on FB... look how far I've come! Also, I love your layout, mine feels even more stale now.
ReplyDeleteI actually used to promote my blog like crazy IRL, which was kind of odd. Nowadays, I do wish my mom and her friends didn't have links to it...I can't ever complain, or even mention my real opinion if it'll get me in trouble. If I get grounded and act all "lesson learned," I can't very well mention it on my blog and defend myself.
ReplyDeleteI truly read your blog out of enjoyment and interest!! You're one of the few blogs I always check updates on :)