"Just because boys kiss you doesn't mean they like you."

The above is some sage advice from one of my college friends.

I was talking with her at a football game Friday and I was just asking her about her classes and whatnot when my friend Hang walks up and sits down next to us.

Hang is awesome, but as soon as she sat down the conversation veered from academics and professors to boys. And girls. And the fun stuff that you can do in college.

As my college friend divulged her various exploits we all leaned in and ooh-ed and awe-ed in jealousy and fascination at her experiences, even if they were cringe-worthy (and some of them really were).

After perhaps 10 minutes of chitchatting the woman in front of us turns around, her face contorted in distaste and said, "You need to turn the smut down. It's starting to get really bad."

And we were all like:

And my friend was like, "Okkkaaaayyyy." And we promptly moved to the colder, remote part of the football stand that only the "cool" 13 year olds and pot heads sit at.

Honestly, if she didn't want to hear anything offensive she shouldn't have sat in the student section. Also, after a few minutes of observation I realized that her son was a band student. Why is this observation important?

I don't think she realizes the amount of "smut" that her son engages in that is actually a million times worse than anything she heard while eavesdropping on our conversation.

What makes it even funnier is the fact that my friend didn't even say anything that explicit other than the fact that frat guys get pretty rowdy.... The really explicit stuff she mimed. And unless that lady had eyes in the back of her head then I doubt she really had any reason to scold.